Does Your Spouse Listen to You?
Love listens. If someone doesn't listen to you, they don't love you.
Yes/No: My spouse listens to me and seeks to understand me.
Why Does This Issue Matter?
Even if we have our spouse's ear but don't know it, our relationship will be hindered. Communication is vital to creating the bond that we desire. Without it, we have very little chance of knowing our spouse or being known by them. If we are not known, we will not feel loved. Being confident that your spouse listens to you and seeks to understand you is foundational to being loved and loving.
What If You Said Yes?
Don't just have your spouse's ear, use it. Make sure that they are as confident about having your ear as you are about having theirs. Then leverage that communication channel to nourish intimacy and connection. Create patterns where you talk about more than just day-to-day life, kids, and money. Also have times where you discuss your hopes and dreams, aspirations and memories.
What If You Said No?
Good communication is a developed trait. Many couples hesitate on this statement from the assessment because they have not intentionally developed the skill of listening. They listen to respond not to understand. They assume they know one another, never realizing that people continually change. Love causes us to listen but it also drives us to learn to listen. Sometimes the absence of listening is a sign of a failing relationship, but many times it is the cause of the struggle. Learn to listen and your love will deepen.
Article: How to Get Your Man to Listen
Article: How to Make Your Wife Feel Heard
Book: Crucial Conversations by Kerry Patterson
Book: Happily by Kevin A. Thompson