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  • Kevin A. Thompson

Is Your Spouse Lazy?

Relationships take work. When a spouse is lazy the marriage will suffer.


Yes/No: My spouse is not lazy and does not act like a child in any aspect of life.


Why Does This Issue Matter?

Marriage is an institution for adults. No one thinks it would be wise to marry two five-year-olds. While cultures might disagree on the proper age of marriage, we can fairly say it is meant for adulthood. Yet many adults still act like children. They seek the benefits of marriage without accepting the responsibilities. They refuse to mature in certain areas. They place unhealthy expectations on a spouse to carry too much of the weight of the relationship. When adults act like children, the marriage ceases to be healthy.


What If You Said Yes (4-5 on the scale)?

When you are married to someone who works hard and plays the role of an adult in every circumstance, give thanks. It is a sign that you have respect for one another. When respect is present, a couple has a tremendous opportunity to move forward in a variety of areas of life. Leverage this respect not only for your good but also for the good of others.


What If You Said No (1-3 on the scale)?

If you said no, the question becomes whether the parent/child relationship is simply situational or is it chronic. Both are a problem but one is easier to solve than the other. If it is situational, identify the circumstance and get help to mature in that area. For example, if one spouse struggles to responsibly spend/save money, there are a variety of books or classes that can teach proper money management or several systems that would put boundaries in place so that the issue doesn't hurt the relationship. However, if the parent/child scenario is chronic, professional help will be needed.


Related Resources:

Article: Six Signs of a Lazy Man

Article: Marry a Partner, Not a Child

Book: Friends, Partners & Lovers by Kevin A. Thompson

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